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Submitted on
June 14, 2010
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taste the venom between the smacking
of twin lips as they break their joint spine
and revel in the sound of death drilling
behind your eyelids until alone is a sound
you think you might want to rest in.

close your heart and button up the shutters
and board up the doors until the wind howls
and the chain is beating against the wood
with a hollow sound like a fist knocking,
but you know better, because no one has
knocked on this door since thirteen hundred
days ago when time was starting and you
had fresh pain[t] and a bright smile.

music hurts in the way of your skin peeling
and love is too bright to even look at and
the voice you want to wrap up to swallow
your breath is strangely missing and no
matter how hard you try, this absence
is just the lack of anything and you can't
drown in nothing no matter how
damn much you want to.

your back is in knots and your head is in
pretzels and you're screaming without making
a sound and crying without dropping a tear
and your flesh is melting all over your skeleton
and down your jeans and no matter how fast
you clean up the mess, you're just making
more of one until you're gone and you're
here and you're hollow and you're swollen
and you're dead, but not really, because
you're just alive enough
to wish
you
weren't.
{"the sun on the sand, on her knees and her hands
as she begs for her fish from the water
but turn them away, she's a whip and a slave
given time she may find something better
oh, how the rain sounds as loud as a lover's words
and now and again she's afraid when the sun returns"
--iron & wine

fair warning: i'm probably not going to reply to comments on this one.
i'm just too damn far behind. i will read them though.
tonight is, well, yeah. making me write scraps.
78% chance this will be deleted by morning.
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:iconearlyinjune:
EarlyinJune Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2010  Student General Artist
It's amazing how you can put to words so well the feelings that so many of us have felt to some degree but have never found the right words to express them. Thank you for writing them so beautifully.
Reply
:iconjazzeigh:
jazzeigh Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010
the last verse had my mouth fall open
Reply
:iconrennskye:
rennskye Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2010
You know what I say about you scrapping thins and how you're not allowed to, right?

This... this hurt. This felt like falling apart in hours and days rather htan seconds and minutes.

"this absence
is just the lack of anything and you can't
drown in nothing no matter how
damn much you want to."

Or in years. In years, sitting and staring at yourself as you rot away into bones and no-skin, until everything you were turns into mulch on barren ground so it can't help anything grow. A numb feeling, cold but not as ice. Just cold. Ice would have too much emotion with it, too much to it in general as compared to the nothing here - maybe not cold, either, just not-warm. Yes. It's not cold, no, there is no cold, only the absence of heat.

("Now it's over I'm dead and I haven't done anything that I want, or I'm still alive and there's nothing I want to do" and you can't tell the difference)

"and you're dead, but not really, because
you're just alive enough
to wish
you
weren't."

And this. That chills me past the bone. Works it's way up in side of me and tears.

I'd clap, but suddenly my hands are too hard to life. Bravo.
Reply
:iconlivingdawn812:
livingdawn812 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2010
*hand claps of the millions inside my mind whom are cheering for this epic piece*
Reply
:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
I love the ending. :giggle:
Reply
:iconperidot-magelette:
peridot-magelette Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2010
good lord.
Reply
:iconalicedanielle:
AliceDanielle Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2010  Student Writer
ohmygod. i haven't read anything by you in awhile, but this makes me want to again. you are amazing. reading it made me feel, and (to me) that's the best you can do when writing. (: and that last stanza was SO. AMAZING. i hope luck is on everyone's side and that 22% of you wins, because deleting this will do more harm than good.
This made me love you, and love you're writing. (: and to the person that said to delete it: they must have a learning disability and not be able to read because all of your fans (you can argue if they are misguided or not, who cares) do not lie. <3
Reply
:iconeyesfullofstardust:
eyesfullofstardust Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2010
this is my favorite of your poems because it's filled with pain and sometimes poems are the best place to put your pain, it's like a healing process.
Reply
:iconsolaces:
Solaces Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2010
THAT said, I do like many aspects of this poem. As usual, your imagery is fresh and rewarding, but something about the last stanza kind of bugs me. The imagery is, not bad per se, but not exactly you.
I don't want to say it's cliche either, but it's just not satisfying, especially for finishing up a poem.
Reply
:iconmeghamuffin22:
meghamuffin22 Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2010
:love::love::love: this is gorgeous. lovely. amazing. astounding. b.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l!
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